Blogging from Beyond the Classroom

AP exam and such

2010-05-03T20:31:00.000-07:00

AP Government exam....
I hyperventilated before the exam and almost did afterwards.

Overall it was alright. Ms. Duggan scared the shit out of me when she said we only had 5 minutes left when it was actually 30.

We had auditions today for Dracula and I tried out for Mina I think I did alright. I'll find out on Wed.

I also find out tomorrow if I got a babysitting job over the summer. I hope I do

I need the money.

Had a rough last night but today everything is ok

2010-04-20T19:38:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I applied flat out for 7 jobs

Applied for 2 more at home.
I'm going to be on my third tomorrow.
I was going to apply to two more BUT one's website isn't working and the other one's website is so confusing it makes me want to slap it.

I didn't really want to work at the place the website is hard to figure out anyway.

Last night Chris was all "blah blah"
Today he was better so we're good :3

I've recently been addicted to the Ukulele version of "What you're told". Which is sung by Stephen from Midnight beast. I don't know if he wrote the song but I know there's a studio version coming out or is out somewhere but I love this version. It has meaning, but that's not just why i like it. His voice is very unique and I love the tune.

:D toodles.

Oh did you see the new i-phone on gizmodo?
awesome

Why do I always make my blogs at like 2am?

2010-04-17T23:57:00.000-07:00

That I do not know.

Probably because I have nothing better to do lmao.
I have a story for yous though.

I needed a strapless bra for this dress I was going to wear to this confirmation party
so I went to Victoria's secret and this girl named Helene helped me. She was really nice
and mom was like 'can you make sure she's the right size?' and the lady was like sure
but she couldn't be accurate because my shirt was particularly tight so it was getting a 34 C but she knew I wasn't that so she went with what I told her 34 D
so she handed me a few and talked about them I went to try the two on
and when I had the second one on i was like
ok
I like this one, it doesn't slip or anything. and the lady asked me if I wanted her to see if it fitted right
and i said sure
she walked in and said "uh... you have it on too tight"
and then she tried to make it looser but it was too loose
she's like "i need to measure you"
she then looked at me and said
you're wearing the wrong bra size

you should have seen the look on my mom's face
she was about to die
she was like OMG NOOOOOOO
and I was like LMAO I'm the same size you were in highschool!

So the lady gave me a regular bra to try on to show me what a bra should feel like
i was like
OMG THIS IS SO COMFY AND NICE
and it was an adorable floral bra with lace on it
and I ended up getting that bra

Has fun with fun story.

other than that I went to Chris's little sister's confirmation party and had fun with his cousins/uncles and such. They're all nice people

So my dog...

2010-04-11T18:19:00.001-07:00

She isn't fine.

We have to put her down tomorrow.

*cries*
I'll never be able to make it through tomorrow.

What's up with my dog and maybe what's with me.

2010-04-03T23:15:00.001-07:00

My dog has Lime disease. She's going to be fine so yay!

My friend broke up with her bf cause he was possessive (which he was, and he's a total douche nozzle but I digress) and she likes my other friend, who was straight but now she thinks she really likes her so they went to a party together and had fun, so they're going to go over one of their houses to see if they'd date.

What's up with me? Nothing, I'm less stressed from the school work. I've come to realize that when something happens it happens. I've come to accept it.
Woo

I realize that someone I know is watching this.

2010-03-31T21:00:00.000-07:00

Therefore I can't say too much stuff about things that involve people in my school.

I will say a few things though. I'm totally stressed out. I haven't been getting work done because of all of the nerve things going on. Maybe I finally lost it. My chest gets heavy almost every time I thought about it. It's not bad now but yesterday it was bad. I almost couldn't breathe.

Also my dog is really sick. I'm afraid she's going to have to be put down. At least I was on Monday but I think now she's alright, but probably has a urinary tract infection.

Therapy

2010-03-22T18:06:00.000-07:00

I started last week but just now feel like writing about it.

I have a therapist. For all of the emotional issues and depression and insecurities and stuff like that. D:

So I'm working on it.

Yeah. I'm in a blah mood right now.

I'm worrying over something that there is absolutely no need to worry about.
So I'm attacking it by going numb.

The RI Drama Conference/festival

2010-03-13T22:36:00.000-08:00

Well it was AMAZING

There's just so much to say
Hair was a fantastic musical and Just Like I Wanted made me cry oceans.
Honest it did. The mother in that play is too much like mine. She has terrible days at work and gets yelled at a lot and she's always depressed. The father is sorta like my stepfather always yelling and ugh. The son who killed himself (that's not a spoiler) was like my real father. I imagine that's what he was thinking at the time when he did it. And I. I'm that little girl. The one that asks why isn't he coming back? Didn't he love me? It was too close to home for me to not cry.

All the greatest books, The rules of comedy, Killing Bill, There's something rotting in the state of Denmark, You can't take it with you, and any other funny one I didn't mention were amazing, hysterical. I like how in the "rotting Denmark" one every time someone stepped on Polonious he'd squirt out silly string instead o blood.

I didn't see the 12 Jurors, but the Laramie project was an eye opener and the acting and set in Dancing at Lughnasa was awesome! Love Maggie!

I was able to give a toast at lunch there "To Theater and to Drama!" and they all cheered and clapped for me. I was happy. We all love each other despite knowing each other. That's where we belong. I feel so alone now w/o them. This was my first and only year. How depressing. lol. We went last too sadly. It was worth it though.

It was worth it.

Talking to an old spark

2010-03-02T23:26:00.001-08:00

It's been a while since we last talked. I was mean to him at first, out of my own spite. But I warmed up. It's so nice to have a good conversation with someone after a long time of not talking to them.

There's so much to talk about and not enough time in the wee hours of the morning to do so. I feel a sort of relief lifted of my shoulders that a relationship that I thought I was the only side turns out I wasn't. It feels good to know more of the story after a couple of years.

You'd think it'd be awkward but it's not, we're friends it's like talking to any other friend.

Or at least a friend who you can actually have a good discussion with.
It's a good feeling.

A break up

2010-02-19T21:10:00.000-08:00

My friend broke up w/ his gf of 2 months. He said he felt guilty because he told her he loved her cause he was desperate to find "the one" I believe him, he's that kind of guy. She is a creepy obsessed woman that keeps making facebook comments like. YOU LIED, WOMEN AREN'T OBJECTS! etc.

My boyfriend and I are defending the guy cause she's being overly dramatic she's said she's been abused and I believe her, but it's her fault because you can tell she asks for it. She doesn't stop when she should, she goes overboard w/ every fucking thing. She falls in love in a week, he didn't even say it first, it was her, she was all over him. She convinced him to have sex with her. She did all of this nasty shit and now he's the one who's guilty? Then today she wrote "don't talk to me if you're against me"
Well I would if you STOPPED WITH THE STATUSES dammit

I wrote this to her yesterday
"Mary look you're being way too emotional. You don't fall in love in a week. "Oh but true love is love!" No shut up, that's not how it works. You have no clue who Mark is. You can't go around saying F this and F him and you treat me like crap because you put yourself up for it. He has feelings too, you know. He didn't just dump you and say "phew glad I got that off my back" he's in emotional turmoil too and you're certainly not helping. You're not a bad person but you seriously need to shut the fuck up until you know what the hell you're talking about."
(those aren't their real names)

and now she's like "we made love, we were lied to"
Bitch....
"Mary, look you're upset, we know already but this is NOT something you post PUBLICLY! You ask us to not talk to you if we're against you but you just keep asking us to say something. STOP WITH THE STUPID WHINY MESSAGES! Delete this status. You're only creating more haters for yourself. You're killing Mark and you're flat out pissing me off. If ...(tharr be more) Peer into the depthsyou had two brain cells you'd realize that we wouldn't have said anything in the first place if you didn't write something PUBLICLY ON FACEBOOK! Stop it, seriously."

My new status is "Stop asking for verbal abuse"

I wouldn't bother w/ her if it wasn't one of my closest friends who she's making feel so guilty until he wants to kill himself.

Eh not much since I'm on vacation.

2010-02-16T20:25:00.000-08:00

So other than nothing much, I met a kid I went to junior high with at a restaurant, he works there. XD

I was like

WOAH lol

I kept looking at this kid like

I think I know him.
hmm

He looks like someone I know.

and then while he's waiting a table I'm like OH He looks like Alex! and the other waiter who's cleaning the table goes "yep that's him"

I'm like WHAT LMAO
then he went in for a hug sorta and I'm like "buahh?" and didn't realize it was a hug
then he was like
you probably don't want... and I'm like OH sorry XD

fun times.

Other than that there's not much. Eh. lol

Songs that change your outlook.

2010-01-30T21:43:00.000-08:00

The song from Kingdom Hearts II Dearly Beloved really changes my outlook on life, well at least for a moment until it stops and I listen to something else.

It's a calm, sad and innocent song. It reminds me of someone being pushed into the filth that is life today.

Which is why I have a new goal. To stop swearing. I swear almost constantly, it's a little gross, I'm pretty sure this goal will die quickly since I'm in one of those late night cleansing moods but swearing isn't good anyway.

So yeah that's about all I have to say.

VidCon John Green and Tessa's 24 hour blogtv show

2010-01-29T19:16:00.000-08:00

So yeah.

Wewt Semester has ended my gpa is a 3.98 something.

XD

So I've been watching Tessa's 24 hour blogtv show.

The Nerd Unit has been on, Wheezy Waiter is on right now, Tessa obviously and Ray, and Will of DC she's at their appartment andddd, John Green was in the chat!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OMG SAKJDFOISEJRSIDJFie (he left cause the baby woke up)
I'm sorry but that made my life.

I've been thinking of asking my parents to go to vidcon for my graduation present and John said you should! and he replied to me when I asked him about Henry <3 (his new baby) I'm excited, now I HAVE to ask them.

People are drinking and it's funny.

I'm just super happy!!!!!!!!!!!
This week's been busy though and that's fine.
Wewtt

Yay<3

Physics and Our book club!

2010-01-25T15:36:00.000-08:00

So on Friday I wasn't feeling too hot about the physics test I had just taken.

I got a 63, which is bad by my standards, but this is physics and I got what I deserved.

My overall physics grade for the semester though is an 86. Which is good by my standards, and because this is an honors class that B is actually an A which is awesome.

I decided not to blog over the weekend since no one reads these XD, but my friend who is also in the book club has one so we're gonna follow each other hopefully :D

My first follower!

We had a party in french and stuff, yeah, new precal teacher, and going to the nurse during band because of cramps. Fun stuffs.

Anyway, our book club started today.

Caitlyn thinks that it's best to leave it at "The book club" because it's ironic, it isn't a book and it's so horrible.

I like that idea and we'll end up sticking to it but for the blog that I've created (it's on tumblr, I'll end up having another blog on this account for it too) is called My Immortal Pain.

It's more attractive to the internet user eyes than "The book club" because the book club doesn't tell you what we're reading, where My Immortal Pain, it says it right in the title.

Anyway we read through ten chapters and they're all awful as hell. I found a drinking game online about it. Jesus if you played it while only having one of the criterion you'd get drunk as a skunk. (That saying makes no sense, skunks don't get drunk!)

Anyway I'm out :3

Tubing!

2010-01-22T18:23:00.000-08:00

He took me tubing! It was awesome fun, but his wallet fell out of his pocket when he was tubing. So we were trying to get to Chili's and nooo that failed cause there was a bridge with a toll of 4$ and we had to pass through it twice, then when we finally got to chili's we found out he lost his wallet, so we went back to the place and luckily the people who work there found it.

Other than that today was a stressful day.

Liability

2010-01-21T18:46:00.000-08:00

Apparently for my 1 year anniversary w/ my boyfriend I have to go somewhere, where he has to sign a liability paper in case I get hurt!

I'm thinkng OMG I'MA GONNA DIE

I'm starting to get over it but, oh geez I can't even tell my mom cause she'll flip and say no. So I'll tell her after.

It's not like she'll read the blog first.

That's it lmao.
Crazy ass day though, lots of running around.

My Immortal

2010-01-20T20:34:00.001-08:00

Today what hectic. My friend didn't know what to do for her ride to the drama team practice today, she ended up staying at my house and doing then going from my house and we had to bring her home. It was fun though, I got her to read My Immortal, she found it hysterical.

My Immortal is a famously bad fanfiction about gothic harry potter and such, it sucks so much it's great. We're actually starting a book club for it! We'll be reading it after school on mondays or fridays, it's 44 chapters long it would last for at least 7-10 weeks. It's going to be hysterical. Reading such shitty spelling and writing with other harry potter fans. Let the lulz ensue.
I'm listening to a dramatic reading right now, it's soooooooo funny, the guy's voice is great, it's only for chapter 17 but it's epic.

Drama team was fun, especially at the very end when we were reading my immortal on Taylors Kindle.
I want one of those XD

At the beginning I had to act like a nerd, dorky snorting and all, it was pretty awesome. :3

Mainly today has revolved around My Immortal so it's been pretty boring.

Whoops Sarrhy.

Menstruating Conscious

2010-01-19T17:32:00.000-08:00

That's what I am!

I'm helping a friend out with a little issue.
But yeah, can't discuss it, or else someone who I might know might read it and figure it out! Oh noes.

Lmao like that will happen, but during this whole thing I told him, "I'm suppose to prevent you from doing stupid shit, I'm basically your menstruating conscious," which is why that's the title of this blog.

How lovely?

Other than that, today was boring, this bitch first period was, "liek omg this girl took my seat again" Even though she had sat there once out of the whole year last week. She's such a stupid whore. So is her slut of a friend, they hate me because I despise them with a passion. They blatantly made fun of this girl who was sitting right next to them just to make her feel like she didn't deserve the flute solo she just received, it's like "HELLO EARTH TO FUCKERS!!!" Their heads are so lodged up their asses it's funny.
I got a little heated, they're dumb though I can't help but hate stupidity.

Now I'm talking about this girl, whose rotting from the inside out, she's so empty minded, and stupid, she's like the average teenage girl, but is just dumb about it and does it more than she should.

Sigh, people in my school.

Work, and fears

2010-01-18T19:59:00.000-08:00

Bleck, that's basically all I can say about work.

Fears. I'm talking to someone "deeply" about it now. Basically I say a fear I have and she tells me my desires and actual fears from that one.

So like being afraid of the dark is the fact that you're afraid of not being in control, like "how can you rule while being blind," I fear being in control, but it's the same as wanting to be in control, control your way out of responsibility.

O__o I get it, but it's like, "don't tell me this."

I like being in control of myself. Hate groups, mostly because I'm afraid to contribute. Yay for me.

I'll live under the notion that I'm a hopeless romantic whose insecure and such. Wewt.

Other than that, I'm bored and I haven't blogged in a while. I really should keep this up.

I had a dream the other night (I have massive ADD at times)
I think it'd make a great creepy pasta.

It was about a family that was at a beach near a rock wall and behind the rock wall was a cave, burrow, it had two wide open entrances with a little space of wall in between them. The family (a brown haired husband, blond wife, two kids, girl blond the other brown) swimming near these caves and killed a rare sorta monster like fish earlier i guess. A giant wave then comes and kills the wife and leaves the rest of the family stranded on the beach except really little. And there's now an old short and sorta fat witch lady whose really nice but tells the family they must protect these monster fish at least 1000 of them before they can get back to normal size and leave. There was no use in running, and so they started saving them. The case that was in my dream, there was one on a hook alive, caught by a blond surfer dude and his friends and the family was almost normal sized the dad was talking about how that wasn't very nice to the fish and let the fish go and saying our work here is done and leaving.

Fun stuffs.

I had a dream last night about recording my band midterm I had to record and I was talking to someone I know named Dave about it.
My older brother had the same dream, creepy.

Also on friday, it's my one year anniversary with my "boyfriend" (bad word) Chris he's great, and I love him <3

(Yeah this blog sorta sounds like every emo teen's blog wewt lmao)

Turning a new leaf

2010-01-01T20:22:00.001-08:00

While I'm listening to "Duet with myself" video by charlieissocoolike, I have an optimistic feeling. After the first blog post. I got super lazy and decided not to do this anymore. I lied. I'm back, and on the new year! Yeah my "dream" to be a Disney Engineer totally died so easily. I'm so indecisive, it's great. :D

I didn't make any resolutions but there's no need to! If I REALLY wanted to do something I would do it then, not wait until now. Of course with the turn of the new year I'm going to try and study more and read more. It's a shame, there isn't enough time in the day, I don't want to break my internet habit. The internet is a HUGE part of my personality and I love myself for that, but I do need to go on it less than my average of 8-9 hours on a school day. Hopefully I can cut it down to 6 hours by March then gradually go down to 3 on a school day by the time I need to start studying for my AP exams. That will be a LOT of work but if I make a plan and do baby steps I know I can do it! (Of course being on the internet for school work doesn't count ;D)

There's so much that I want to do. Like actually post videos on youtube, I'm waiting until I'm 18 to do that. Unless I can't. I really want to start making video's during college. I'm sure my parents wouldn't be to happy about me starting one, they weren't when I was 14-16. I'm 17 now but eh. I could ask. I'm too much of a nice gal too just go and do it. I respect the fact that they want to protect me.

(I need to change my emo about myself section.) Everyone is like me in a way, and I'm like everyone else. But the best part is, I'm completely myself. Sure there are a lot of quirky girls who have problems and have fun but we all are different (even if it's hard to tell). So yeah I hope anyone who reads this had a happy new year!

You might be asking why..

2009-12-05T21:23:00.001-08:00

Why did she use a "Toy-Story" quote as the title of her blog? Two reasons. One, it sounded cool, simple enough, my immediate decisions aren't based on deep intellectual meanings etc. Secondly, my dreams will take me to infinity and beyond if I have the ability to achieve them.

Before I go on and rant about my dreams and hopes, you know, all the sappy sh*(r)t, I'd like to talk about my day. I had an interesting time running around trying to find a weather balloon so that Nerdfighteria could find them and give the prize money to charity. I didn't find any, but it was fun driving around with my boyfriend to the highest point in RI and running around the woods with a pair of binoculars. Then we chilled at his house and went to go see "A Christmas Carol" in I-max, it was ok, didn't use the 3D like they should have. Then ate, fun convos, then his family, and myself went into Spencers and looked at obscene things and laughed. An awkwardly funny day but none-the-less a better than usual one.

Now onto the hopes and dreams. It's weird to say, but I have a lot of dreams. I don't want to be a famous singer, or actor. I don't want to be a millionaire, or a CEO of a huge company. I want to be known on the internet world, play the ukulele, be in a major orchestra. Help the world from Global warming, along with everyone in it, and finally... Be a Disney Imagineer, specifically an illustrator. It seems that Disney is now full of Teeny Boppers and less than marvelous means, but I know that Walt's dream for a clean, fun, and magical place is still there, in the heart of Disney. I just admire his means so much, I've read bad and good things about him but I couldn't help but fall in love with Disney and the idea behind it.

Anyway, there are other things I'd like to do, but those are the main ones, they change so often but some just don't go away.
This blog is to have other people see into one more life, to open their eyes to what humanity has to offer, good and bad. The view into a extraordinary young girl with dreams and the weight of the world on her shoulders, and to keep track of my life.

Gab up&out